My bday ♡

 
 

 

So for my birthday I told my mum to find a place we can go for archery.

Archery is a sport my mum had gotten into back in 2005 & I followed along with her. 

 2005, I was 11 years old & yes... now 32, I've got 21 years to hold a bow.

 

Just in the idea of the whole ritual of archery,

I got wildly inspired. 

 𓊈This personal story of mine reminded me of the story of Odysseus𓊉

 When he strings the bow, he isn't becoming someone new but he's revealing someone who was there all along. 20 years of hardship changed him but didn't erase him & so the bow didn't create his identity but recognized it.

The arrow only moves forward after being drawn backwards.

The past does not define where it will go but because the tension

is getting transformed into momentum.

The draw is not the destination, it's what gives the arrow its fight~

 

 𓊈Then it's funny how my anthem "Hold on, let go" is tied to archery𓊉

 

Hold on to the bow, your stance, your breath, your intention

then let go~ 

 

       The song says 

Too fast, too slow
     So far, so close
        No high, no low
                         Don't let me go
                                          Too fast, too slow
                                                 Lost in tempo
                                                      Stuck in echo 

     Don't wanna hold on, let go~

When I notice it's a different game
              Reminds me to keep my eyes open
                          I know that you might feel the same
                                     Don't wanna get stuck in my emotion 

 

Letting go of things that no longer serve me & also "don't let me go" while I'm on this path right now. Because let's address the elephant in every post for quite some time hahahhahaha. His love has created the safety for change & he triggered every damn thing I had to face in order to get free & live. Peace is something I can choose again & again.

 

And so my birthay was not becoming someone new 

but

remembering who I am. 

  

 

 So let's get back to that day~

 

In the morning I had to go to work.

 

It was already 2pm & my father had to stay longer at work so he dropped me at the tram.  

  

"Taking the tram in my dirty from paints clothes & shoes ON MY BDAY?" 

is what I complained about on my head. 

 

But then I was like

"Hell yeah, I'm doing that on my bday. That's special!".

I didn't have my card for the metro. Then as I arrived at the metro, a man was walking towards my way looking at his ticket with a confused expression. 

I was just walking straight ahead so I got closer to him & then he handed me his ticket coz it still had time left for usage. Just like that~

Anyway, I got a taxi after the metro so I can have more time to get ready.

 

 

I really wanted to take my time observing & feeling the whole ritual of archery. My body took its form right away when I got the bow in my hands, as if the body remembered. At first I was not pulling the bow far enough & after a while I started feeling more confident about it. 

 

 

And here, gals, caught on camera getting a hit by all of my thoughts & letting go.

All of my high theories & thoughts & analysis were around COMMUNICATION.

I don't know. The archery tutor told my mum that she doesn't let her body go as well when she releases the arrow. And it all made sense to me. 

The significance of 5. The number 5 was the main symbol I kept seeing in my high theories. Patterns that all resemble this number. 

My 506 theory. 

Anyway~ after an hour or so we went for a nice walk at the stores with my mum.

How much we enjoy home deco stores~

 

Then we got really tired, it was 8something pm I think, so as we were heading back, we picked up my best friend from her job & came back home together.

 

My best friend surprised me with a black forest sweet

& the number 16 on it, along with a thingy that plays the happy bday melody lol. 

16 is an inside joke she made 

"What should we get for our friend who's turning 16?"  

 

 I took my time making my wish hihi & she was like "What took you such a long time?

& I was like "I was making a big wish". Ugh, it sounds funnier in greek.

 

Then my mum also brought me the Lila Pause cake she got me. 

So grateful for everything.

I cherish all of their gestures a lot.

 

 Then in the night, I went out with my friend & I told him about all of my high theories & letting him know the cheesy part of them that ends up romantic in theory between me & my charismatic. That's why I could not tell my charismatic any theory till the end, with details, as it ends up romantic hahaha, so I was letting him burn his brain-cells (sorry T-T) & of course we don't want to confess to him that we adore him or something... 

 We were also looking up some djs & showing him charismatic's music.

Nonono, the outing wasn't just talking about my charismatic hahaha. It's that my guy friend is so happy to listen about us so I went ahead freely~

 

 Don't be fooled, my bday post connects my previous post

with the next one...  

 I always serve josei manga~